Not so long ago, we were hit by a tsunami, a giant wave that changed the landscape that was so familiar to us.
This giant wave came without warning, and hit us with its merciless force. This tsunami was different, because it wasn't a giant seawall. This tsunami was called abrupt change.
This wave of disruption took away people that we loved and cared about to unknown places. Some of the survivors have changed forever...their lives impacted in ways that at times we cannot even describe. There is fear, sadness, insecurity, and mistrust. The landscape forever changed. I am surprised by the reaction of the survivors, myself included. I see us avoiding the "talk", isolating and expecting the next blow...the aftermath.
It's very sad how the appointed believe they can accomplish change when they treat it as a step. Change is a process and for it to be effective, people need to be ready to change. Change isn't something you can push down someone's throat without choking them. There are stages to go through.What happened to the work of Prochaska and DiClemente? What happened with the five stages of change- pre-contemplation, contemplation, preparation/action, maintenance, termination and recycling?
Before any endeavor takes place, readiness to change needs to be assessed. When those steps are not taken into account people may experience serious distress, acute stress reactions and they may exhibit resistance. By neglecting the process the risk of losing great people increases.
Sometimes I think that the ones gone are lucky, since they don't have to experience the daily struggles to survive the day. I am not able to confirm that, since they are not around to answer my questions.
I strongly believe that agencies have the responsibility to provide an environment that is healthy, and fertile so people could flourish. If they hold back the nutrients and resources they are failing us...
How can we provide services and meet someone's needs if our own needs aren't met? How can we jump the lake without getting wet, or the swamp without getting mud on our clothes?
Let's brace ourselves for the unknown...
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Sunday, July 15, 2012
An Eventful Night!
Today I had my family over for a summer cookout. When I say family, I don't mean my kids. I use family in the Latino sense.
My life is so complicated, at times absorbed by work, and school; and my family brings such great simplicity that places everything into perspective.
We ate, we laughed, we almost cried and some almost fought ... a normal family.
At the end of the night all the adults sat around the living room, some on the couches and some on the floor. In that space that is hardly used I had the core of my upbringing, I had the ones that helped become the woman that I am today. It was like having a treasure right there in front of my eyes...my mom, my grandma, my uncles, my aunts and my cousin. We told stories of passion, pain, suffering, courage, love and above all... family.
By listening to the stories I realized the impact that my family had and still have in my life and the way I raise my children. I saw courage, strong will to go on despite the obstacles. I saw the great passion placed in relationships and the pain experienced after they end. I saw open wounds that still bleed occasionally. I heard about adultery and how a marriage became stronger after it. I heard about forgiveness, and motherhood. I heard how one have been there for the other in times of pain and suffering to help carry their load. Right there I reaffirmed how lucky I am to be born in this family. I also realized that I want to do this more often because I don't do it enough. I want to be a hoarder of memories, and allow moments like this to take my breath away... many more times.
We are not perfect, but we are perfectly imperfect. This family is like a forest, there are different trees but they all bring beauty to the scenery. Everyone is purposeful and beautiful in their own way. The most important thing is to accept each other as we are because we all have a story behind us and we need to create the forum for those stories to be told.
My life is so complicated, at times absorbed by work, and school; and my family brings such great simplicity that places everything into perspective.
We ate, we laughed, we almost cried and some almost fought ... a normal family.
At the end of the night all the adults sat around the living room, some on the couches and some on the floor. In that space that is hardly used I had the core of my upbringing, I had the ones that helped become the woman that I am today. It was like having a treasure right there in front of my eyes...my mom, my grandma, my uncles, my aunts and my cousin. We told stories of passion, pain, suffering, courage, love and above all... family.
By listening to the stories I realized the impact that my family had and still have in my life and the way I raise my children. I saw courage, strong will to go on despite the obstacles. I saw the great passion placed in relationships and the pain experienced after they end. I saw open wounds that still bleed occasionally. I heard about adultery and how a marriage became stronger after it. I heard about forgiveness, and motherhood. I heard how one have been there for the other in times of pain and suffering to help carry their load. Right there I reaffirmed how lucky I am to be born in this family. I also realized that I want to do this more often because I don't do it enough. I want to be a hoarder of memories, and allow moments like this to take my breath away... many more times.
We are not perfect, but we are perfectly imperfect. This family is like a forest, there are different trees but they all bring beauty to the scenery. Everyone is purposeful and beautiful in their own way. The most important thing is to accept each other as we are because we all have a story behind us and we need to create the forum for those stories to be told.
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